Fashionista and midlife social media influencer, Shauna describes the intense hot flashes and uncontrollable periods that defined her menopause journey.
Fashionista and midlife social media influencer, Shauna describes the intense hot flashes and uncontrollable periods that defined her menopause journey. She explains how her doctor “helped me realise what was going on in my body.” She challenges women not to fear menopause, but to talk about it and embrace it.
menopause: unmuted is designed to raise awareness, encourage communication, and share information. It is not designed to provide medical advice or promote or recommend any treatment option.
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menopause: unmuted
A podcast series to share menopause experiences
E1: Shauna’s Story
It’s time to unmute menopause.
Hello, and welcome back to menopause: unmuted, a podcast series sponsored by Pfizer.
Menopause is a time of huge change for women, and it can affect almost every aspect of our lives, from our health to relationships.
And it can sometimes be hard to talk about. We’re here to help make that easier by listening to how other woman have navigated their menopause journeys.
It didn't dawn on me that I was in the stages of menopause at that time, because I was still getting my cycle, my monthly cycle, everything was still kind of regular, there were no indications, and I still felt so young of mind.
It seems to me that until you really hit menopause, you don't start talking about it with your friends. And then they start opening up and everyone starts sharing things.
Now at 57, I, I've now feel like I'm 37. Now obviously, I've slowed down a little bit. But my energy and intensity is still the same.
I’m your host Mary Jane Minkin. I’m an obstetrician gynecologist and Professor at Yale University School of Medicine. And for Season 2 of the podcast, we’ve turned to the online community, where so many midlife women are connecting and sharing their experiences.
I’d like to introduce you to Shauna Robertson.
Yeah, the hot flashes really are probably the most embarrassing thing other than the uncontrollable periods. I started having really erratic periods, probably in my late 40s.
Alongside the classic hot flashes, heavy bleeding was a problem for her, and it’s a symptom that a lot of women report.
Let’s unmute Shauna’s menopause.
Hi, my name is Shauna and I have a blog called Chic Over 50 that I started about five years ago. It's helping me learn how to become a businesswoman, which I've never been before. I have three sons and seven grandkids. And I was just remarried a little over a year ago, and … to a wonderful guy. And he's got five grandchildren. So now we have 12. And we're living a very happy life down in southern Utah.
Some of the things I like to do are play tennis, play golf, I'm very competitive. I always want to do my best, very athletic, love anything that keeps my body going. And I grew up in a large family of 10 children and loved it. And that's about it for me.
I started my menopause, I think about five or six years ago, I'm not really sure when it started, it was just very subtle, subtle changes in my body. First noticing the hot flashes and didn't realize at first that that was even because of menopause. I just thought maybe it was because I was hot.
When I first started having these little bouts of hot flashes, I always thought it was just maybe because I had eaten too much sugar, or ... for whatever reason. And I guess it was maybe when they started happening more frequently. And they were always happening at night. And they started to get more intense where I would literally wake up and be so wet that I would have to go change my clothes. Sometimes they would have to change the sheet. I'd have to go get a towel maybe to put on the bed so that I wouldn't get the sheets all wet. It was so horrible. And I think it was about then that I realized that this wasn't just me getting hot. It was me having the hot flash experience, like I had heard my mom talk about.
And I'm really good at going to see my doctor every year for my annual check-up. And of course, being in my 50s she would ask me, you know, are you going through menopause? So she really is the one that educated me, helped me realize what was going on in my body.
It’s very normal for women not to realise that they are in the early stages of menopause – in what we call perimenopause. Perimenopause is the time leading up to full menopause, which, of course, is not having a menstrual period for a full year. And then we know things are going to be done.
However, even before you skip a full period, you can have things like hot flashes, night sweats, problems sleeping, irritability ... All those fabulous things can be going on as the hormones are changing; what’s going on in perimenopause.
I’d always encourage an early conversation with your health care provider – just to talk through any changes that you, or the people close to you, might be noticing. It can be less stressful than waiting until sleep disruption and temperature fluctuations are interfering with your life. And it can also be really useful to keep a diary of new symptoms; what triggers them, are they cropping up in the same point in your cycle, is there anything that makes them better?
It’s a little tactic that can help you get the most out of that first consultation.
As Shauna found out, the hot flashes can take some getting used to.
The hot flash thing, that that's the biggest thing that I deal with. And they're horrible. It's a horrible feeling to be talking to somebody at a close distance. Or like for instance, when I was getting my hair cut or when I was getting a facial, and you could start to feel them coming on. It's so embarrassing and you always hope that they don't notice, but you know that they have to because you could literally take your hand across your face and see moisture on your hands. It's, it's the weirdest feeling.
But the hot flashes, I think … I always felt like I could control them better if I ate better. I don't know, from a medical standpoint, if that even makes sense. But I, I feel like if I stay away from the sugar and eat a very healthy diet, that they're not as bad. And so if I knew I was going for a hair appointment, or for a facial, or to get my eyebrows done, or whatever it was where somebody was going to be in my face, I would try really, really hard to eat really, really good for a day. And like I say, I don't know if that makes any sense. But that's sort of how I felt. And then I would just try to ... if it was a woman, and if it was a woman that was my age, sometimes I would say something like, I'm so sorry, I'm having a hot flash. If it was a younger girl, I wouldn't say anything because in my in my head, I would think they're not going to understand what this is.
I think menopause, you don't really get until you've been there and you've started experiencing some of these things. So with the young girls, I was just kind of, you know, whatever happened, happened, and hopefully they would understand.
Yeah, the hot flashes really are probably the most embarrassing thing other than the uncontrollable periods. I started having really erratic periods, probably in my late 40s. And as time went on, they sort of got less but then I would have one day, I mean, it was literally like for 12 hours where they were so heavy, that I pretty much would have to stay home. I was competing in tennis at that time. And I can remember one time, a couple times, in fact, where I was out on the court competing in a match and feeling a problem coming on. And that was, that is so awkward, because there's nothing you can do. It was like a flood and nothing would hold it. It would go down my leg, you know, in a little tennis skirt. It was, it was so awful. Then later I heard one of my tennis teammates tell me that she had gone in and gotten an ablation, which is where they cauterise your uterus, and it stops your periods. So I went and had that done.
As Shauna notes there are many particular foods that can be specific triggers for hot flashes. Spicy foods, MSG, red wine, hot beverages; all of these can be triggers for women. And many women do find, as Shauna did, that a highly concentrated carbohydrate load will induce them. And what I tell women, is if they really want that glass of red wine, and they know it will give them a hot flash, then they can brace for it, so they can handle it as they will.
I see a lot of women with heavy and unpredictable periods. The fancy word for this is what we call menometrorrhagia – how do you like that?! Is this particularly associated with the early stages of menopause? Yes. And what it’s about is that we’re not ovulating as well, making a hormone that I refer to as the policeman of the lining of the uterus, which is progesterone. And that leads to this crazy bleeding.
As Shauna explained, concerns about sudden onset of bleeding, or being unable to manage it certainly can create anxiety.
Now, we have many methods that can help control the bleeding. Shauna and her friend had chosen an ablation. What an ablation is it just basically destroys the lining of the uterus – the so-called endometrium, where the bleeding comes from, and it destroys the lining so that it cannot bleed.
And there are many techniques to perform an ablation. Believe it or not, things like laser, hot water, radio frequency are all techniques that end up doing the same thing: destroying the lining of the uterus.
However, the hormonal changes persist, the ablation does not destroy ovarian function, you just don’t bleed.
Shauna’s ablation was particularly useful because it helped her continue her active lifestyle, which is so important.
These days, lots of women in midlife are prioritising their fitness. And staying fit and healthy will not only make you more physically strong, which is great for bone health and combatting osteoporosis, it can also really help to maintain your emotional resilience too.
This is menopause: unmuted where we talk about real women’s menopause stories.
I’m your host Mary Jane Minkin and If you’d like to find out more visit menopauseunmuted.com or talk to your health care provider.
Let’s get back to Shauna’s story to hear how she prioritizes a healthy life.
Like I said, I feel like my, my level of health has contributed greatly to the way I've been able to get through this.
As, as we age, our metabolisms start to slow down. And so it's really, really super easy - and we're all going to get there - where our middles start to thicken up, we start to gain a little weight, we have to eat less, we have to move more, it's just the way it is. And it's really, really easy to all of a sudden let that teeter totter of balance get really, really off balance. And all of a sudden, we've gained 10 pounds, it's not two or three, it's five it's not five then it's 10. It's not 10 now it's 15, you have to stop it. Having control over your life, in whatever that means to you is so empowering, and will help you if you if you feel like you have that you're going to be able to get through so much more in such an easier way. And so I would just tell women, take little baby steps, whatever it is you're doing to improve your health and your circumstances, your situation, whatever that little bit is, counts. And as soon as you know how to do that little bit, then do a little bit more. And it builds up, the baby steps do count.
So whatever it is you're figuring out to do to make yourself healthy. It has to be a lifestyle, has to be a habit. And you just start with those little things day by day and I promise it adds up. And the healthier you are and you feel, the happier you're going to be. And the better you're going to be to your spouse, to your kids, to your grandkids to your friends. It just, it just all works together.
I feel like this, this platform of all these women talking together is amazing. When I was growing up a young girl into teenage years into young adulthood, honestly, we never talked about this ever. Like, never. I never talked about this with girlfriends, with my mom, with my sisters, I just didn't, I don't know why it's just how it was. And so to be able to talk to other women and listen to other women explain and tell their journeys, and what they're going through, first of all, it, it, it makes you feel like you're not alone. It is that sense of community is amazing, you feel so supported, and so normal, and so validated.
I've always wondered why women are afraid to say their age. And I run across them periodically on my blog and my social media. I think women should be proud of theirage, I am so proud to be able to say that I'm 60. And I think that society is accepting women doing different things than they did you know, years ago.
And I think as far as how we can help society, with the way that they look at women, I think what I'm doing is, is helping for sure, the younger generation. I can't tell you how many young girls have messaged me, and said, thank you so much for showing me that I can wear ripped jeans when I'm older or that I can have pink hair when I'm older, or I can't believe that you are doing that at your age, I think it's awesome.
For some women, 60 is the new 40! And Shauna makes a really good point here; the more comfortable you are with your stage of life, the less stress you’re going to feel. And if you’re less stressed, you can prioritise self-care. Talking openly with people you trust is a fantastic way of building those foundations of self-acceptance.
Shauna’s advice about baby steps and keeping the balance in check is really solid. It’s much better, and more achievable, to work towards small, realistic health and lifestyle goals that you can maintain over the long term.
And it is true that the metabolism does slow with age. You know, it’s an interesting conundrum that exercise itself really does not reduce the hot flashes. However, it will make you calmer in the long run and less stressed. But, weight loss does help with hot flashes. So if you can lose the weight the hot flashes will improve. The mechanism here is interesting. Less insulation means that the heat that’s generated centrally can pass through to the outside.
Is there a connection between sleep and weight gain? Yes. And we all know that if women sleep poorly, they will have more trouble losing weight. And we also know that heavier women can have more problems with sleep apnea, so this is complex.
So the best thing I would suggest is exercise, lose weight, end up with less hot flashes, sleep better, and then things spiral up in a good direction.
Let’s leave this episode with a final thought from Shauna.
I would tell those women out there to not be afraid of it. Erm, I think there's so much stigma about what menopause is. And, of course, some of the things are not fun to go through erm, and I've been one of the lucky girls that haven't had to go through some of these other things that women are talking about. But don't be afraid of it. Talk to your girlfriends about it. Use this podcast series to become familiar with what's going to happen. Erm, what to expect. It just I don't know, I just don't feel like women need to be afraid of it. Take it by the horns and, you know, do the best you can with it. But there's so much out there for you to listen to and feel supported by and, and so I would just say, yeah, just, I guess my biggest message to them is just not be afraid of it. Just really don't be afraid of it. It's just part of life and you'll get through it.
Don’t be afraid. That’s a great way to bring this episode to a close. And I want to say a huge thank you to Shauna Robertson for her story today.
Every woman will have her own unique experience of menopause. Some lucky women barely notice it, and for others, it’s a major turning point.
Regular, open conversations with your health care provider will help to ensure that you’re healthy and there are a whole host of treatment options which can be tailored to you.
I’m Dr Mary Jane Minkin, thanks for joining us today, and please check out our show notes at menopauseunmuted.com.
And in our next episode, we’ll be unmuting Chenoa’s story.
But one night, I remember my, my husband was approaching me in an intimate way. And it just started to, rather than turn me on, make me really agitated. And that was really interesting, because there was nothing going on between us - like we weren't having an argument or a fight - we were just in a very loving moment.
Don’t suffer in silence. Don’t worry about speaking up about your menopause.
Women should be able to discuss menopause with their health care providers. A woman can speak out about menopause with her OB/GYN, primary care provider, nurse practitioner or midwife. There are even designated menopause practitioners that a woman can visit if she needs more information.
Special thanks to the Global Women's Health team at Pfizer and to Studio Health for producing this series. Talk soon.
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